"Kitty bite my weener," Jack says as I change his diaper...this is the latest and greatest. "My weener needs food!" My weener, mommy weener go bye bye, daddy weener, everyone's weener. I can only imagine he gets it from his father - after all, this is the man I saw grabbing his crotch on local television while refereeing a championship football game. That's my honey! If it's not the crotch, it's "tooting". Everyone toots. He plugs his nose and laughs. I knew he'd be a really "boy" boy...after all, I wanted to be a boy for the first 10 years of my life.

Christmas is fantastic for us right now. I am like a child again, waiting for Christmas morning and all that it will bring Jack this year. Last year he was about 10 months and although he was running around, wasn't too interested in presents or Santa. As my friend Sarah says, Christmas is reason enough to have kids...he is so delighted at everything! The lights, the tree, the gifts, and Santa. He loves to say "ho, ho, ho" and "merry Christmas!" He thinks snowmen are Santa and he marches around the house laughing as he sings "Jingle Bells". Kids truly bring out the best of the holiday season. I can't wait to watch him tear into presents and marvel at all of the goodies Santa has brought down the chimney. I might cry just thinking about it. I tried very hard to get him to work with me on a Christmas card picture. Last year was so easy! I'll admit, they are cute, but I felt like nothing really captured his personality. Here are some of my efforts:

He is such a nutball and finally was only interested in opening the tin cans that had presents in them and I gave up completely. Those have now made their way to the top of the cabinet...for some reason I felt I needed a variety of packaging...needless to say, he hasn't bothered the tree much. I can't say the same for Rex Walters.

Speaking of the pets... some pics...they are becoming friends now that Dottie is gone. Just the other day we got her shot reminder and it left us a little sad for a day or two. I am sure Dottie won't miss those. I think I am still having a hard time with her being in the ground and wonder about our decision. I don't think we could have had her cremated under the circumstances and timing of her death and I love that she is close, but I constantly worry about her being cold...or struggling to get out. Holy shit, am I really talking about this? Stop. Enough digressing...it's Millie & Rex Walters wishing you all a happy holiday.

Christmas is Coming!

One Christmas when I was about 10, we'll say, I received a red Huffy dirt bike. I was not about to ride around town looking like a bad ass on some banana seat bike with a basket on the front. Besides, it wouldn't go with my hand-me-down football jerseys and baseball glove. I'm sure my parents thought I was confused about my gender and maybe even my sexuality, but in any case, Santa indulged me and I wish, wish, wish that I could find the picture of me sitting on it Christmas morning, wearing a football jersey nightgown. OMG, I know. Anywho, that Christmas was amazing! I got the bike, I ruled the neighborhood and kicked a lot of guys where it counts. So, the point of my story is that this may be the best one since. Thank you, Jack.

He runs around the house singing "Jingle Bells" and trying to open Christmas presents. He has his own tiny tree. He kisses each ornament on the tree and loves Santa. He says, "Merrrrrry Mismas!" and loves looking at lights. At this very moment, he is singing a song of his own creation in his Christmas pj's. Crazy how your kids make you appreciate Christmas and Santa all over again, and no matter what, he will always be a part of Christmas for us. I am a huge Christmas fan, but this has brought things to a whole new level. I can't wait - I have been transformed from a 31 year-old-mother (eek) to a 10-year-old waiting for her red Huffy bike to arrive.

On television: "Watch football!" On Barbie: "I yike Barbie!" On the Nuvaring commercial where they jump in the pool (I know. Don't ask): "I yike that kid!" Broccoli: "I don't yike dat". He gives Eskimo kisses, butterfly kisses, and "kitty" kisses, which is something he and I came up with together. He loves getting in "mommy bed" and going "with me" whether we are going to the kitchen or going to the store. He now says, "No mess with Texas!" on behalf of my great friend Sarah. Further proof that he is truly my child: his need for me to tell him he is funny. He loves it. Every day he asks about his entire family and wants to know where they are and if he can see them. He has such a huge personality and an even bigger heart.

Despite Jack's Christmas spirit, the house has still been significantly quieter without Dottie. We are still missing her like crazy and we always will. Jack constantly mentions her and explaining her whereabouts hasn't gotten any easier. He still asks to "see Dottie", to which we look out the window and look to where she is buried to tell her hello. Funny, even Jack has become increasingly protective of Millie, constantly wanting to make sure she's fed and has a belly full of biscuits. We are taking things one day at a time and we keep her close to our hearts, always. At least this year we know she will not be tearing open any presents - we'll leave that to Jack.